(That's Warm Sunny South, as opposed to GWN or Great White North)
I thought I'd get the ball rolling by just mentioning a few things I've learned in my very brief career in EMS thus far. In no particular order, I have learned.
- If you are 15 and weigh 90 pounds you should not drink so much. Or at all.
- Texting while driving is a really bad idea. Cars roll over and if you're LUCKY your cell phone gets destroyed. If you're not so lucky other things get kinda broken.
- Rearranging furniture that is much heavier than you are ... at 3AM ... bad idea.
- If you stop and think "yanno, I should move my hand before I cut open this box" ... move your hand. You'll thank me.
- Whether you're 30 days old or 89 years and 11 months old it is in your best interest for the people in the ER to do what they need to do to make you better. It would be good if your parents or caretakers understood that.
- Jumping out of moving cars is a bad idea. Young or old, sober or intoxicated ... for kicks or for some reason you seriously can't remember ... it's not going to end well.
- The people in the ambulance and the ER are going to do everything in their power to make you better. However they will WANT to do it more if you're nice to them.
- No matter how much you are convinced that you live on a military installation, if you do not have proper ID and authorization to enter, the powers that be are not going to appreciate your multiple attempts to enter.
- Sometimes bad things happen to good people. It sucks.
- Sumdood* is alive and well the world over.
- Polite goes a long way, no matter which direction its coming from.
- We cannot choose our genetics, but we can make a LOT of choices regarding our health. Making good choices does not guarantee perpetual good health, but making bad choices WILL catch up to you one day. Don't act so surprised when it does. All of those health studies include you too.
- Everyone should learn CPR. Everyone. Everywhere.
- You should wash your hands more often. Seriously. Yes, you. I mean it. With soap. Often.
- Golf Carts can be dangerous.
- "Pull to the right for sirens and lights" applies to you. I don't care if you're driving a (insert important person's car here). LET US THROUGH, GENIUS BOY, NEXT TIME IT MIGHT BE YOUR DUMB A** WE'RE TRYING TO SAVE.
- Older people are still people. They've seen a lot. They're worth listening to. You might learn something, hotshot.
- And finally ... I've learned ... that I have a LOT to learn.
* Credit for identifying the phenomenon known as "Sumdood" goes to Ambulance Driver.